Tag: funny

humor

Top Auto-Correct Fails of 2011

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If you are using some sort of mobile device to communicate, you have probably experienced some sort of auto-correct failure. This is where you meant to say one thing but your phone/tablet/whatever automatically decided that you really meant to say something else, often to hilarious results.
Damn You Auto Correct is a very funny blog which features, you guess it, a collection of outrageous auto-corrected text messages submitted by readers. At the end of last year, it unveiled its top nine laugh-out-loud entries of the year, based on Facebook shares, tweets, comments and page views. For your reading pleasure, please see the list below. Enjoy!

  1. Intended word: “Monday,” not “Man boobs.”


     
  2. Intended word: “Clinic,” not “closet.”


     
  3. Intended word: “Mortgage payment,” not “MOTTSAPPLESAUCE.”


     
  4. Intended word: “Kissed,” not “killed.


     
  5. Intended word: “China,” not “vagina.”


     
  6. Intended word: “Dimples,” not “nipples.”


     
  7. Intended word: “Shirt,” not “shit.”


     
  8. Intended word: “Persian,” not “period.”


     
  9. Intended word: “Mistletoe,” not “cameltoe.”


     
art

From the "Art Imitating Life Imitating Art" Department

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This news is a few months old but just as funny now as it was then. A few hours after television producers set up a replica of Occupy Wall Street for the filming of a new episode of Law & Order: Special Victims Unit, the real Occupy Wall Street announced plans to occupy the fake one.
As Mother Jones put it, “It’s straight out of a Don DeLillo novel.” I frankly just love the speed in which this happened – further proof the “art-life-art” cycle is moving faster than ever.

humor

Funny numbers

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Let’s say you are bored and want to dial some fun. Why don’t you call 719-266-2837? I decided to press “3” for a little pick-me-up. That didn’t make you smile? Then try 772-257-4501.
Still not smiling? Then, you should try 212-660-2245 because I’ve got nothing for you. Single men and women – you might want to write that last number down…

humor

The Sh*t |Insert Type of Person Here| Say Meme

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Memes are an interesting little phenomenon – I love how quickly they can take off, like how a video one day can have zero views and the next day have over a million views.
The most recent meme to catch on like wild fire is the “Shit |INSERT TYPE OF PERSON HERE| Say” meme.
It started with “Shit Girls Say,” which was followed by “Shit Black Girls Say” which was followed by “Shit White Girls Say to Black Girls,” which was then followed by all sorts of derivatives, including the great “Shit New Yorkers Say – “You have to go to Brooklyn, it’s the law!” though I love the Pat shout outs as well – and the not so great “Shit Long Islanders Say.”
Not one type of person has been spared this meme’s wrath. Not Rednecks. Not Hippies. Not gays. Not lesbians. You name it. No one. And this all happened in the span of a few weeks. Amazing.
One organization that is jumping on the meme bandwagon is Americans Elect, which Media Bistro basically said made this meme jump the shark. Check out their Sh*t Politicians Say video below:

humor

On Nostalgia

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One of my all time favorite Onion articles is from 1997 and it’s titled “U.S. Dept. Of Retro Warns: ‘We May Be Running Out Of Past’.” It starts with:

“At a press conference Monday, U.S. Retro Secretary Anson Williams issued a strongly worded warning of an imminent “national retro crisis,” cautioning that “if current levels of U.S. retro consumption are allowed to continue unchecked, we may run entirely out of past by as soon as 2005.”

I thought the idea was hysterical at the time and in subsequent years, as I went to “Culture Club” in NYC and saw how quickly the 80’s seemed “cool” again, I’ve thought more and more about it. Walking home from the train today I saw a kid rocking Reebok Pump sneaks with a Seattle Supersonics hat that looked straight out of 1989 and boy was I taken back to Junior High. Nowadays, people are walking all over NYC with hot pink and electric blue Ray Ban-ish shades that make them look right out of “Fast Times at Ridgemont High” and I’m wistful for own “youth” at the ripe old age of 34.
While it seems that the Onion’s 2005 date in the article was off a little bit, their vision of a nostalgia gap is coming true, and it’s not just evident by looking at what the “kids” are wearing these days. The kids themselves are pining away for their own “childhoods.”
Case in point, today’s NY Times has an article titled “The Good Ol’ Days of 20 Years Ago” which talks about how Nickelodeon, bowing to Millennial pressure on FB and other places, will be airing “classics” from the 1990’s. Yup. Classics from the ’90s. The gap is closing, and closing fast!

“Are 18- to 34-year-olds too young to be nostalgic? Evidently not. Starting next Monday, TeenNick, part of the Nickelodeon family of cable channels for children, will start rebroadcasting old series from the 1990s that are considered classics by young adults. That’s right: classics from the 1990s.”

Art imitating life imitating art. Love it.

humor

Zen and the Art of Hot Dog Eating

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I read a wry and witty joke yesterday that made me chuckle. It’s been around for a while – eBaum’s World posted it in 2007 – but this was the first time I heard.
What did the Zen Buddhist say to the hot dog vendor?
“Make me one with everything.”
The Zen Buddhist payed with a $20 bill, but received nothing back. He asked the hot dog vendor, “Where is my change?”
The hotdog vendor replied, “Change must come from within.”
Love it!

humor

Honey Badger

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The Honey Badger is the most fearless of animals – it just doesn’t give a shit.

Happy Friday!
Via Anthony

humor

Snow Adventures

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Anything related to a Dungeons and Dragons adventure makes me smile. My world has become full of responsibilities and stress so anytime the pleasant memories of spending an entire weekend rolling dice and aiming to get a plus two times three vorpal sword from some dragon’s hoard while sustaining myself with slices from a Pizza Hut “Big Foot” pizza are jogged, I get to go to my “happy place.” The comic below that I read back in January put me there. Enjoy.
Snow Dungeons and Dragons

humor

The Rant Heard Round the World

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Bart Scott said it best immediately after the Jets defeated the Patriots last week: anybody can be beat!
Below is one of the best post-game rants I have ever heard or seen and the fact that it comes from a Jet defender makes me smile. “Play like a Jet” indeed. Thankfully, ESPN itself has put it up online which means that I can post it below for you and be confident that it won’t be removed for copyright infringement reasons in the future, always a good thing in a video related post. Without further ado, here is the clip:

j-e-t-s…jets, Jets, JETS!