ramblings

7 Years Later

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I’m staring out my window right now, just staring at the blue sky that’s mixed in with white full clouds, clouds that can resemble plumes of smoke if you want them to. No plane is flying right at me as I stare out across Houston St eight floors above the ground. I’m not going to have to run out of this building as it burns, praying that I make it out before it collapses. Just like last year, I notice that no one is really acknowledging the solemness of today in my office. I am listening to co-workers laugh as they eat lunch and conduct business as usual.

Today is not normal. Today is September 11. Seven years ago I ran frightened up 5th Avenue as a plane roared overhead, thought about diving under a car to protect myself from the immanent crash because I was next to the Empire State Building and the Towers had fallen already but then someone screamed “Its one of ours!” and I saw that it was an F-16 and knew that I was okay for now. “One of ours.” The four American and United planes were ours too, that is before they weren’t.

A comment to a City Room post about the ceremony at ground zero reads, “To this day, when a plane passes overhead, I look at it with trepidation and feel my blood chill just a little.” and I feel the same exact way. Time marches on but we should never forget. I was working in NYC that day and so was my wife. One day our daughter will ask us what it was like and I will not know where to start. Before I left for work today I asked my wife, “What is our family disaster plan?” Just in case.
While walking my dog, I placed my annual bouquet of flowers – lilies this year – in front of my local firehouse and reviewed the plaque of the nine fighters who lost their lives that day which reads,

“There was a time when the world asked ordinary men to do extraordinary things”

Engine Company 22 and Ladder Company 13 lost 9 men on September 11th, 2001 and I felt like an intruder as I dropped off my flowers. The first moment of silence had passed and a large crowd was out front. I wanted to say “thanks” – thanks for making it your job to risk your life to save a stranger’s because my job is to manage web projects and that job feels so trivial on a day like today – but I didn’t know who to thank. I hope my presence said it all.

ramblings

50 Ways To Fix Your Life

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The Dec, 2004 U.S. News & World Reports issue had a feature titled “50 Ways To Fix Your Life” which I’ve been keeping around for the past few years because so many of the suggestions were really, really, really good. I’m not kidding. Some of them are totally common sense but it helps to refresh your memory that you should be doing them. Some of them though are slightly “out-of-the-box” and definitely worth shared. As I’m trying to save space in my apartment these days, I figured why don’t I post this great advice and recycle the mag. I would have just linked to the suggestions but for some reason the links are broken so I’ve decided to take my own time and chronicle the best parts of what I read verbatim (thanks US N&WR). After the jump are 50 ways to fix your life (that is if your life could use some fixing and let’s face it, whose couldn’t?)

    Simplify: 1 – 10 – the greatest journey may begin with a single step, but before you put your shoes on, you need to know where you’re headed. If you’re too busy, it can be hard to choose that path – or to figure out that you’ve already set yourself on the wrong road. Cut back. You’ll be amazed what you learn.

  1. Set your priorities. We spend a lot of time on things that are important but not urgent so we end up running out of time to do everything we want. Try to start each day with a list of the day’s tasks and rank them according to what can wait and what can’t. Mark them A, B, or C and then tear up the B’s and C’s. If you get all of the A’s done, you’ll feel great and have a successful day. The B’s and C’s either move up the list as they become more urgent or they drop off. What most of us do is not make the choice. We just plug along, and then we get frustrated when we run out of time. One way to make sure you don’t run out of time is to slow down, not speed up. You’ll enjoy the things you do more and do them better.
  2. Learn to meditate. Regular meditation can offset many of the effects of stress, it can boost the immune system and help treat symptoms and pain associated with chronic illnesses. Whether its yoga, tai chi, qi gong, or repetitive prayer,, the basic science is the same: stress bring forth a “fight or flight” reaction in the body, releasing epinephrine and norepinephrine into the bloodstream, which increase blood pressure, heart rate and muscle tension. It can be challenging to get started meditating though. One way it to do an exercise called “fill your cup.” You reflective over the coffee every morning for five minutes, savoring each sip and concentrating on “drinking in” the qualities you’ll need to get through the day, like strength or endurance. Then, in the afternoon if possible, try to lie down for 10-15 minutes, rest your eyes and concentrate on slowly inhaling and exhaling while envisioning a favorite spot. Even if other thoughts intrude, don’t feel like a failure, just try to return to the image even if it takes awhile. “Everyone thinks they are bad at meditation – that they’re not disciplined enough, that they can’t make their mind blank – but its is an innate human skill,” says Lorin Roche, author of Meditation Made Easy.
  3. Clean your closets. If you haven’t worn something in two years, either donate it or throw it out.
  4. Donate your phone. Non-profits will take your old cellphones. Help a brother out.
  5. Save your snapshots. Get old photos out of boxes and into albums. They’ll last longer that way and you’ll be able to enjoy them.
  6. Store by season. If things are rationally together, your closets will make more sense.
  7. Bag it. Shoebags can a lot more than shoes and hang off of the back of any door.
  8. Move to Bismarck. This isn’t for me but many publications think that the North Dakota capital is a fantastic place to live, work and raise a family. You won’t find me there anytime soon but for some, the mix of shorter commutes, less violent crime and better graduation rates than any other state is tough to pass up.
  9. Stop doing housework. American women spend 358 hours a year cleaning up. Be a little less neurotic and you’ll have more time to enjoy the things you care about.
  10. Quit your job. Quitting can be one of the most empowering and active decisions that a person ever can make. All things must come to an end, and by choosing when to quit a job, a relationship, a philosophy or a bad habit, quitter direct their own destiny. For one thing, companies are not loyal to employees anymore. Nobody blames you anymore and asks why you didn’t stick with things. If you are feeling a lot of stress and anxiety or you’re not sleeping, it’s important to pull back. Take 20 minutes in the morning and ask how you can be the person you want to be. Sometimes it can be scary to listen to your inner voice because the implication is that you have to make changes. Don’t quit because someone discouraged you. Don’t quit out of fear and don’t quit because you lack focus and before you quit, try out your new interests to see if you really are suited for it. Sticking with something you hate may take hard work but knowing when to quit takes wisdom.
     
  11. Stimulate:11 – 16 – a tired mind isn’t a happy mind. What can you do to recharge your batteries on a daily basis? Using different parts of your brain in unexpected ways can help, whether it’s digging in your garden, reading a challenging book, rocking out to your new MP3 player – or just tossing a ball.

  12. Use your gray matter. We know know adult brains can grow and change. The brain needs both physical and mental exercise. For starters, people who exercise do better on cognitive tests than their less fit peers. You are never too old to start a crossword puzzle, read some serious literature or even play billiards. In the end, because physical activity, mental challenges and strong social ties all appear to be good for the brain, those interested in keeping their brains honed to a keen edge might ant to combine social and aerobic activities and choose thought-provoking social events.
  13. Grow a plant
  14. Time to play
  15. Listen to new music
  16. Read more books. Don’t read because it will improve the inner working so your brain, nor because it will make you seem more cultured to other people. Don’t read just because it will give you a greater understanding of the world outside your immediate experience. Read because it is one of life’s great pleasures.
  17. Have more sex
     
  18. Organize: 17 -25 – Not everyone is born with the neatness gene. But i can be a learned behavior, and the result is more time, space, and energy to devote to the important things in life. Getting your finances under control, maintaining better files, kicking the clutter habit for good – these are hard steps to take, but the rewards are enormous.

  19. Fix your finances
  20. Cut back on the fees. Don’t use ATMs from other banks, reduce your brokers fees and try no-load funds.
  21. Re-balance investments. Take some of your winnings and reinvest in an under-performing asset.
  22. Freeze your credit cards. Literally: put your plastic in a bag, then freeze it in a container of water. IF you get the urge to splurge, at least you’ll have to wait for it to thaw.
  23. Plan for the worst. Set aside 3 – 6 month’s worth of expenses – in a money market account, where you won’t be tempted to spend it.
  24. Re-figure your FICO. Get credit card balances down, pay all bills on time, and don’t seek more credit than you absolutely need.
  25. Make an emergency plan
  26. Master your data
  27. Learn to file really well
     
  28. Get Well: 26 – 46 – In the end, they say, your health is all you have. If that’s true, too many people are still squandering their most precious resources. Still, it’s not too late to change. Whether it’s eating better food, getting enough sleep, or finally tossing the smokes, you can feel better (and maybe even live longer)

  29. Exercise, a little
  30. Quit Smoking
     
  31. Eating better:

  32. Try greener greens. Swap spinach for iceberg.
  33. Consider cantaloupe. A single medium-sized cantaloupe has more vitamin A andCC than an apple, orange and banana combined – and fewer calories to boot.
  34. Wipe out white. White foods contain calorie-heavy, nutrient-light refined carbohydrates.
  35. Toss the can. Americans drinks about 15 billions gallons of soda a year and all that sugar adds extra pounds.
  36. Treat yourself. When you do splurge, spring for the real thing but in moderation.
  37. Get married
  38. Eat your vegetables. Recent studies show veggies combat cardiovascular disease, obesity, even asthma. So just do it.
  39. Wear your bike helmet. About 67,000 cyclists end up in emergency rooms with head injuries each year; wearing a helmet cuts the risk of injury by at least 45 percent.
  40. Watch out for deer. Collisions with these critters kill some 150 people a year. Studies say deer whistles don’t work; paying attention – especially at dusk and dawn – does.
  41. Install a carbon monoxide detector. Fumes from faulty fuel-burning appliances can kill. You can’t see or smell the gas, so it’s impossible to detect by yourself.
  42. Get a paper shredder. Unsolicited credit card offers can give identity thieves all the info they need to open an account in your name. Shred ’em before you pitch ’em.
  43. Peer in the dark corners. Especially during winter when insects are usually dormant, check the attic, basement, and garage for signs of bees and other potentially perilous bugs.
  44. Become a birder
     
  45. Living healthy:

  46. Floss your teeth. ‘Nuff said.
  47. Stretch regularly. Even if you don’t have time to exercise, make sure to stretch – gently. You’ll keep muscles limber, ease joint pain and improve circulation and boost energy.
  48. Wear the right shoe size. Most of use don’t believe it or not and a bad fit can cause bad back problems.
  49. Breathe. Relaxing improves physical and mental health; 10 deep breaths will do.
  50. Take vitamins – the right vitamins. Most people are fine with just a multivitamin and taking too much of a lot of different supplements can hurt the body and the wallet.
     
  51. *MISSING*
  52. Take Stock: 47 – 50 – Is this the life you want? And if it isn’t, how can you tell? It’s easy to get so wrapped up in daily stresses that you forget to take a step back and reassess. Sometimes this stock taking means giving more to others; other times it requires tough self-examination. Either way, it is a very good idea.

  53. Take up philosophy.
  54. Volunteer. It doesn’t just help people on the receiving end; it drastically improves the health and happiness of the giver, too. Elderly volunteers demonstrate a decrease in depression and an increase in overall physical health – and they live longer than their non volunteering peers, according to a 2002 U of Michigan study. Child psychologists say that volunteer work helps adolescents and teens build valuable self-esteem and socialization skills. If you can’t avoid an office job at a non-profit, join up with an organization that will allow you to play a more dynamic roles. For the elderly and the retired, experts recommend 15 hours a week of volunteer work. For younger volunteers, it may be important to choose an activity that won’t create stress by gobbling up time in an already strained scheduled. Volunteering increases a person’s sense of responsibility and strengthens our political culture.
  55. Get a new look. Updating your wardrobe can came a world of difference.
  56. Forgive. Major world religions have long considered forgiveness one of the most important human virtues. Jesus’s radical forgiveness is the foundation of a Christianity; Judaism’s high holy days, Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur, are focused on atonement; Buddhism calls for ceaseless empathy and compassion towards all beings, especially enemies; in the Koran, the angel Gabriel tells Mohammad to set aside vengeful anger and from the Bhagavad Gita, a classic Hindu test: “If you want t o see the brave, look for those who can forgive. If you want to see the heroic, look at those who can love in return for hatred.” Indeed, there may be trespasses that are too vast to forgive. “Some people see forgiveness as a panacea, and that everyone is obligated to forgive every injury or crime. Real forgiveness is an inner transformation, and it takes a lot of work on the part of both the victim and perpetrator. To ask a victim for radical forgiveness can be unrealistic and morally unjustifiable. For those who do decide to forgive, researchers stress that it’s important to begin by acknowledging that you’ve been hurt. Then try to empathize with e person who hurt you. Look beyond your personal experience, and place the hurt in context with world events. Finally, decide to let go of the weight and stress of your anger for your own benefit. Forgiveness is an ongoing process; the anger will very likely come back. “It’ll just be weaker and weaker until it loses the intensity, and that’s where you find freedom.
ramblings

Where's the Beer?

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I was recently at Ryan’s Irish Pub in the East Village enjoying a nice cold post-work Guinness when my friend Steve pointed out that the pint I was drinking was not truly a pint. Over the past decade since I returned from living in London, I’ve gotten used to the size of an American pint, which is 16 ounces, while a real pint in my opinion is 19.2 ounces – the way they serve it in Britain. In the UK it’s technically called an an Imperial Pint and has been a government-regulated standard for several centuries. I’ve never seen that size of a pint in the States unless it was at a “real deal” Irish pub, like Kinsale Tavern in the UES (which is where I watched a lot of both the 2002 and 2006 World Cups – if you are a footie fan, this is the place for you, that is if you do not want to go to Nevada Smiths).
So, I was shocked when Steve showed me that the my pint, which I thought was 16 ounces was actually less – it was only 14 ounces!

Through a cute use of glass blowing, the outside of the glass is the same size as the 16 ounce glass except the inside contains less liquid. This allows a bar to sell less beer while still charging the same amount of money, thereby making more per keg while screwing the customer in the process. And here I thought that Ryan’s was a “real deal” pub….
While I’ve seen ketchup bottles and other commodities engage in this type of consumer trickery, this is the first time that I’ve seen bars display this type of method to squeeze more money from its patrons. Its one thing that a 750 ml bottle of Belvedere vodka is much larger than the 750 ml bottle of Reyka vodka – they are still both 750 ml. Its quite another thing to order a “pint” and not get one. I hopefully will not be going back to Ryan’s in the future – if I need a great pint of Guinness, Molly’s Shebeen is just up the block.
Via Steve

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Something I Will Not Be Doing

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ManBabies is one of the most ridiculous web sites I’ve seen in a long, long time. The concept is simple: using Photoshop you manipulate a picture that has a father and child in it by swapping their heads. The result is often not only funny but sort of disturbing – like the one below:
ManBabies.com - Dad?
As some know, I became a father for the first time last week. I solemnly promise that you will not be seeing any pictures of me and my girl on that site any time soon.
Via Bonnie

ramblings

Subway Love

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I would like to start off by stating that I have been waiting to post until I have had enough time to write a super well thought out piece about something very relevant to the issues we face today. This has been a bad idea though because this amount of time either never comes or when it does, writing about the issues we face today often makes me either angry or sad, or sometimes both at once, which then discourages me from putting my thoughts down in a binary way. I mean, what kind of a world am I bringing a kid into anyway, right?
Well, to brighten things up on this rainy Monday (which as an aside is the name of a “Shiny Toy Guns” song that I love), it is a world that has subways! As a kid, I loved the subway – the machine’s motion mixed with all of the revolving human commotion that occurs on the platform and within – and I still do as an adult. I have loved living in both NYC and London – two cities with iconic underground systems – for this very reason as I flat out love not owning a car.
Regarding my home city’s system, in 1972, Massimo Vignelli developed a now famous map of the NYC Subway system. I was happy to learn that you can now buy an updated versions of this map but watch out, its a tad more expensive than the free ones the MTA distributes.
I was recently made aware of Eddie Jabbour’s attempt at building a better mousetrap so to speak called Kick Map which is pretty cool as well. Here is one critics take on it:

“The Metropolitan Transportation Authority might learn from Eddie Jabbour. After studying more than a century of New York train and subway maps, Jabbour concluded that the current map, which originated in 1979, has become obsolete. Jabbour started buying old subway maps on eBay and researched their histories. More than two years work culminated with his own, a smaller and easier to read map influenced by all its predecessors.

Indeed, his map is easier to read. It is clean, uncluttered and efficient. There is a folding, pocket-sized version, smaller than a calling card. Every train line is depicted with its own corresponding line on paper. It’s easier to tell what train stops where on his map.”

In summation, I promise to try and post more, even if they aren’t 5,000 word screeds about the idiocy of our war in Iraq, the looming recession, the mortgage crisis or other fun topics.

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Pet Names

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I’ve listed below the 10 most common dog and cat names based on a recent analysis of VPI’s 450,000 insured pets:
Dogs: Max, Molly, Buddy, Bella, Lucy, Maggie, Daisy, Jake, Bailey & Rocky.
Cats: Max, Chloe, Lucy, Tigger, Tigger, Smokey, Oliver, Bella, Sophie & Princess.
Two things of note: 1) Max wins for both and 2) human names are more popular for dogs than cats which I find a little odd.

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Being Everywhere At Once

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I’m smack dab in the middle of The Painted Bird, a novel that many people read while in junior or senior high school (for me however it was never included on any class’s reading list).
One passage in particular jumped out at me and I thought I’d share it. It’s about one of my favorite subject – religion:

“The church always overwhelmed me. And yet it was one of the many houses of God scattered all over the world. God did not live in any of them, but it was assumed for some reason that He was present in all of them at once. He was like the unexpected guest for whom the wealthier farmers always kept an additional place at their table.” ~ Jerzy Kosinkski

The book is unique and a well done. I wish I read it years ago….

ramblings

Since I've Been Gone

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Any time I stop posting, it’s usually because I’ve been pretty busy – this time is no different except that I’ve been rolling along at an overall even pace. Since my last post:

  • I rented with friends an apartment house near the Leidseplein in Amsterdam and then the following weekend a swank hotel room with my wife in New Amsterdam because why not.
  • I was bumped up to 1st class randomly on my transatlantic voyage back home from Europa and loved every second of it – truly ka is a wheel.
  • I truly learned the value of the adage “You catch more flies with honey.”
  • I’ve been busy trying to launch a web site – which will happen sometime next week.
  • I started a new footie season and in our 20-12 game one victory, my stat line was just the way I like it: 1 goal & 3 – 4 assists.
  • I remembered to buy Serj Tankian tickets for his show in May at Terminal 5 and was able to score a few.

Things keep happening and most of them are good. We’ll see what the next few weeks bring. I’m looking forward to them.
April showers bring May flowers. Mayflowers bring pilgrims. Pilgrims bring promise. Etcetera etcetera etcetera

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Battle Company's Battle

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There is a forgotten war being fought in Afghanistan that has been ongoing for six and a half years – I remember watching BBC World footage of B-52’s dropping bombs while on vacation in Mexico in October, 2001 – but the Iraq Debacle (FYI – it is now 1732 days since “Mission Accomplished”) has almost completed pushed it into the background. It is almost never mentioned and for the troops that are fighting and dying over there, that is a outright shame.
Therefore, I thank the heavens that reporter Elizabeth Rubin went to the rugged and scary Korengal Valley to spend time with Battle Company and then wrote about her experiences. For me this war was once again pushed to the forefront of my thoughts.
Her report was shocking – we have fellow citizens there who are literally losing their minds trying to win the “hearts and minds” of people who flat out do not care and do not want us there. Villagers who are friends in the morning are enemies shooting at them at night and lying about it the next day. Militants multiply and watch Battle Company’s every move. This list just goes on and on.
The passage below is lifted directly from the article. It is regarding a conversation Rubin had with Capt. Dan Kearney, the leader of Battle Company:

Just before I left, Kearney told me his biggest struggle would be holding his guys in check. “I’ve got too many geeking out, wanting to go off the deep end and kill people,” he said. One of his lieutenants wanted to shoot every Afghan in the face. Kearney shook his head. He wished he could buy 20 goats and let the boys beat and burn them and let loose their rage. He tried to tell them the restraints were a product of their success — that there was an Afghan government with its own rules. “I’m balancing plates on my goddamn nose is what I’m doing,” he said. “All it’s gonna take is for one of these guys to snap.”

I was so moved by the article that I am trying to donate money directly to these guys – not to the USO itself, not to the Afghan war effort, but to Battle Company. These guys have it rougher than almost any American in the world right now – if you don’t believe me, read the article. Some of them are stop-lossed – their contract is up but they are not allowed to go home (because we have 160k troops in, you guessed it, Iraq and are super short on resources). It’s utter and total bullshit and I’m embarrassed that it is happening, that I am a citizen and that I pay taxes that finance this whole shenanigan.
The NYT also has a good Korengal Valley slide show which shows the terrain and the brave men and women who are halfway around the world, doing the unthinkable each and every day.